There’s More to Emotions Than Meets the Eye

When students in my undergraduate classes would hear me announce that at least two sessions would be devoted to the topic of the “Development of Emotional Understanding,” they usually assumed I would simply be listing the ages at which children come to understand different facial expressions – like smiling means “happy” and crying means “sad,” etc. They quickly learned, however, that there’s a lot more to it than that—a lesson that it’s helpful for parents to understand as well so they don’t expect too much from their young child. Here are just a few of the important facts about emotions that adults take for granted but which children must learn—and with supportive parenting (especially parents who aren’t afraid to talk with them about emotions), tend to learn much more quickly. I've taken these from the chapter on Emotional Understanding in the book I co-authored with Dr. Susan Goodwyn entitled Baby Hearts: A Guide to Giving Your Child an Emotional Head Start

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1.Human emotions are vast in number and subtle in their differences. Consider the following different feeling states: Cranky, Cowardly, Curious, Confident, Coy, Cagey, Confused. And these are just ones that start with “C.”

2.Emotions, even strong ones, tend to fade over time.

3.People often experience two or more emotions at once, sometimes even conflicting ones (for example, a “bittersweet” experience).

4.A person can pretend to feel one way when he is really feeling another.

5.One may not actually be aware of one’s own feelings.

6.Certain emotions are not appropriate in certain situations (for example, being gleeful at a funeral or sad at a wedding).

7.Emotions can be powerfully influenced by being in a crowd.

8.Talking about emotions requires knowing your culture’s peculiar metaphors for feelings, such as the following English terms for “happy:” Tickled pink, pleased as punch, thrilled to death, happy as a clam, contented as a cat, on cloud nine.

With all this to learn, it’s enough to make a child “as nervous as a cat on a hot tin roof.” Let’s just take one of the above, #3, as an example. A study published in the May 2007 issue of the journal Psychological Science has demonstrated that it’s probably not until children are 10 or 11 years old that they even experience mixed emotions, and, not surprisingly, it’s not until they are capable of experiencing such emotional states themselves that they begin understanding that this possibility exists for other people as well.

It’s no wonder, then, that “emotional understanding” develops gradually even into the teenage years. Actually, I’m betting that we all know adults who still have some growing up to do in this very important domain! .

Happy Signing (and don’t forget to visit us on Facebook)!

Linda

Linda Acredolo, Ph.D.
Professor Emeritus, UC Davis
and
Co-Founder, The Baby Signs® Program

With Signing, Babies Pick the Topic!

As most readers of this blog know, my collaborator and best friend, Dr. Susan Goodwyn, and I conducted federally-funded research demonstrating that baby sign language (particularly our Baby Signs® Program), helps infants learn to talk. There are many reasons for this positive effect, one of which is something developmental psychologists call “infant initiated joint attention.”

What is “joint attention?” Quite simply, it’s when a parent and child are paying attention to the same thing—and “infant initiated joint attention” means that it’s the infant who calls the parent’s attention to something rather than the reverse. And that’s exactly what signing enables preverbal babies to do. When they see a butterfly, they can “tell” their parent about it by doing the BUTTERFLY sign, which inevitably leads to the parent talking about the butterfly—its colors, its flight, other butterflies, etc. Given that we all learn more when we are interested in something, it’s not surprising that being able to launch conversations with signs helps babies pick up words more quickly.

Turns out, though, that the success in initiating joint attention that signing allows has a broader effect, too. Research by one of my graduate students, Dr. Brie Moore, demonstrated that signing results in babies tending in general to initiate joint attention more--even when signs are not involved! In other words, signing teaches babies that their parents will respond positively when they, through whatever means, direct their parents’ attention to something. The other side of this equation, of course, is that a baby’s signing indicates to his/her parents that babies do have minds of their own and enjoy sharing things with them. It makes parents more alert and receptive in general to their baby’s attempts to draw their attention.

In other words, signing has some very obvious benefits—like reducing frustration and tantrums—but it also has more subtle benefits, like inspiring very young children to pick the topics of conversations both with and without the use of signs.

Happy Signing (and don’t forget to visit us on Facebook)!

Linda

Linda Acredolo, Ph.D.
Professor Emeritus, UC Davis
and
Co-Founder, The Baby Signs® Program

Missing the Point

A colleague at UC Davis recently alerted me to a news report from a TV station in Washington DC that raised the concern that signing with babies might diminish interaction between babies and parents. Nothing could be further from the truth, as any parent who’s lived with a signing baby can testify.

First of all, modeling signs for babies means parents are (a) making lots of eye contact and (b) actively looking for opportunities to do so. A mom who might otherwise be content to simply plop a bunch of Cheerios in front a a baby, is likely to put a few down, stay close, and model the sign for MORE when the first ones are gone. Result? More, rather than less interaction.

Second, parents who are modeling signs are inevitably also anxiously watching their child to see if he or she is (a) understanding the sign, (b) imitating the sign, or (most exciting of all) (c) spontaneous using the sign to direct the parent’s attention. Result? Closer observation means more rather than less interaction.

Third, once a baby is able to request specific items with signs, everyone’s frustration is reduced. Result? Fewer tantrums and tears mean more time and emotional energy for pleasant interactions.

Fourth, once a baby is signing, parents begin experiencing the magic of having a window into their child’s mind. This means they can easily figure out what is fascinating their child at the moment (e.g., a butterfly, or the sound of a dog barking) and join the child in reveling in the experience. Result? Richer and more rewarding interaction for both parent and child.

So, next time you hear or read something so off-base as that signing reduces parent-child interaction, consider sharing these points—or better yet, your own experiences—with whomever it is that needs educating!

Happy Signing (and don’t forget to visit us on Facebook)!

Linda

Linda Acredolo, Ph.D.
Professor Emeritus, UC Davis
and
Co-Founder, The Baby Signs® Program

Baby Sign Language: A Boon to Multilingual Classrooms

Last week I wrote about how children being raised in bilingual households benefit from having signs added to the mix. As I pointed out, the logic is simple: When the baby, as an example, hears “leche” from Mom and “milk” from Dad and both parents pair the word they say with the MILK sign, the parents are making the job of understanding the equivalence of the two words much easier. Far from increasing a child’s confusion, it decreases confusion, thereby making the child’s task of conquering the individual languages easier.

Of course, signing has another advantage in multilingual settings, especially in child care classrooms where teachers and families speak different languages: The signs provide a common language so that toddlers who are learning the family language can still make themselves understood. Just such a situation exists at the Center for Child and Family Studies at the University of California, Davis, where graduate students from all over the world routinely enroll their infants and toddlers. In the 22 years since the Baby Signs® Program was first introduced, teachers and parents alike have been amazed at how much more smoothly daily life in the classroom proceeds. The signs have enable children who speak different languages to communicate with their teachers and each other. In one case, for example, a toddler from Israel and a toddler from Taiwan were observed reading a picture book together—with the first girl turning the pages and pointing at objects while the second girl made the appropriate signs!

Bottom line? Signing is clearly a boon to children facing the challenge of hearing multiple languages—an increasingly common occurrence these days—whether at home or in the classroom.

Visit www.babysigns.com for more information about Baby Signs® resources to help you and your baby enjoy all the benefits that signing can bring.

Happy Signing (and don’t forget to visit us on Facebook)!

Linda

Linda Acredolo, Ph.D.
Professor Emeritus, UC Davis
and
Co-Founder, The Baby Signs® Program

Baby Sign Language—A Boon to Multilingual Households

One of the most frequent questions I get is the following: “My baby is exposed to two languages at home. Won’t adding the Baby Signs® Program just make her task more complicated by adding a third?”

The answer is a strong and resounding “No!” The truth is that, no matter what form bilingual input takes, adding signing to the mix actually makes the child’s job easier, not harder. Here’s why.

In a bilingual household, babies hear two words being used to label objects, and what they need to figure out is that both words are equally valid—in other words, that they mean the same thing. For example, if babies hear both the word “leche” and the word “milk,” they need to understand that the words are equivalent.

And that’s where signing becomes helpful. Quite simply, signs act as mediators between the languages, making the equivalence of words obvious to the baby. For example, when the baby hears “leche” from Mom and “milk” from Dad and both parents pair the word they say with the MILK sign, the parents are making the job of connecting the object with the meanings of both words much easier for babies.

In other words, rather than confusing children in bilingual families, signs help smooth the road to understanding and speaking both languages.

Happy Signing

(and don’t forget to visit us on Facebook)!

Linda

Linda Acredolo, Ph.D.
Professor Emeritus, UC Davis
and
Co-Founder, The Baby Signs® Program

Laying the Foundation for Chores

I’ll get to chores in a minute. First, I want to set the stage by reminding readers of how fundamental “habits” are to everyday life. Even when daydreaming we stop at stop signs and red lights. Many of us (admittedly, not all of us!) automatically hang up our towels neatly after using them. And most of us have a ritual we carry out when we first get up in the morning even if we’re still half asleep. These are actions that have been repeated so frequently that they have become firmly entrenched habits;.

Of course, these aren’t the habits we’re eager for toddlers to adopt. Instead, what parents need to consider is the long term advantage of starting early to establish a willingness to help with tasks that need doing, thereby laying the foundation for actual “chores.” Even though they are still too young to take full responsibility for most tasks (e.g., remembering to feed the dog), getting 2- to 4-year-olds in the habit of helping at a very young age will make the transition to true chores much easier.

The good news is that toddlers and young preschoolers love to help. In fact these days it’s often busy parents, understanding that it’s faster to do things by themselves, who demur. That’s a mistake! Taking advantage of this early eagerness will pay off in the long run. Here’s how:

Most parents are wise enough to reward volunteered help with praise and affection—two goodies that are powerful reinforcers for young kids. Such positive reinforcement tends to result in a behavior being repeated—which results in more goodies and more volunteering—which results in more goodies and more volunteering…and on, and on. In other words, the more times a child is taken up on his offer to “help” and leaves feeling good about himself, the more likely he will be to volunteer in the future. Pretty soon helping is an entrenched “habit,” thereby making the move to assigned chores when the child is older much easier.

So what can the 2-4 set help with? They are actually remarkably good at judging what they might be able to manage, so take every “I help?” seriously. The photos above give an example. Two-year-old Julia spends Thursdays in our Baby Signs office with her mom, Bonita. Here you see her accomplishing the task of unpacking rolls of paper towels from a box and stacking them on a shelf in the rest room. Needless to say, she received high praise from all of us Of course, it would have been faster for one of us to do it ourselves, but this way Julia had the satisfaction of a job well done –which you can definitely see on her face as she relaxes in the empty box!

Happy Signing (and don’t forget to visit us on Facebook)!

Linda

Linda Acredolo, Ph.D.
Professor Emeritus, UC Davis
and
Co-Founder, The Baby Signs® Program

To Foster Pride Let Directing Credits Go to Baby

Throughout my years as a researcher at UC Davis, and especially during the years Dr. Susan Goodwyn and I were working on our NIH-funded signing studies, I had the opportunity to watch hundreds of parents playing with their children. One individual difference I noticed, was that some parents were quite “bossy” in terms of dictating what form the play should take.

In fact, we all know parents who over-manage their children, parents who cram their children’s schedules with everything from Acrobats to Zoological Expeditions. What these children lose, according to Dr. Deborah Stipek and her colleagues at UCLA, is not only free time, but also the opportunity to pick their own goals and decide which are worth tackling. It turns out that giving children a chance to choose their own goals is even important for infants and toddlers, especially if parents want their children to develop pride in their accomplishments.

In one of Stipek’s studies in particular, children ages 13 to 39 months were observed playing with their mothers. What the researchers discovered is that when children throughout this age range were allowed to choose their own goals during play, they were much more likely to revel in their own successes. In other words, they would choose the toy they wanted to play with next, or which way the train would face on the train tracks. They showed pride in their accomplishments, calling attention to their success and smiling and clapping for themselves. Children whose mothers were more intrusive, directing their child’s activities toward goals they—rather than their child--had determined, were less likely to display positive emotions and more likely to simply look up at their mothers when they accomplished something (as if to ask, “Did I do okay?”). The difference, of course, is that the children whose mothers were less intrusive weren’t looking to others for validation. In contrast, they appeared to know instantly when they had something to be proud of.

These results support one of the major messages we try to convey to parents in all our Baby Signs® and On the Grow™ classes: It’s important to follow the child’s lead. Thanks to researchers like Deborah Stipek, it’s a matter of fact, not just opinion.

Happy Signing (and don’t forget to visit us on Facebook)!

Linda

Linda Acredolo, Ph.D.
Professor Emeritus, UC Davis
and
Co-Founder, The Baby Signs® Program